Ok ladies...here it is. I never talk about my personal life, minus the rabid ranting i do, the stupidness that i encounter, but i never really talk about me. and in truth this is just a blog where i post stupid crap i buy, and haul along, because in this capitalist, materialist society we live in we are taught stuff = happiness.
With the upcoming election, talk of healthcare and the economy, I never really realized what it all meant. Until now. Mind you i'm the biggest screw up there is. cmon i'm freelancing making ugly websites for people and i can't get a stable 9-5 job. it seems like most people can't now. sadly i can't collect unemployment. before i was a student, and ppl went oh that's great, educating yourself and bettering yourself, what are you studying? now its like what are you? unemployed it seems, before saying you were a student was better. sigh.
my so lost his job. he had been there 8 years. the longest anyone has been in that company minus the boss and owner. apparently that meant nothing. they laid off half the office, the other half got a huge pay cut. not sure which one is worse? anyways in the midst of all this, certain things became frivolous and certain things had to be come more important. surviving.
that's why i am liquidating my make up and other crap. i've got samples from all over that i can live off of. but then i have stuff that i used once, or haven't opened that just sit there, so wasteful i know. time to get rid of it and make some space. that was me shamelessly promoting my wares. i should also say i accept donations now too, but i'm not at that point yet. though i did look at my closet as i packed up my clothes to go to my mom's house, and there i saw all my beautiful betsey johnson and anna sui dresses. all happy in their dress bags, unaware of what would happen next. As i packed up my things, (no don't ask why, we're not getting into that now) i realized i could have opened up a store with all these goddamn dresses. all these beautiful, whimsical, feminine, girly, i'm a goddamn cake dresses, i looked at them and that's all they were. dresses. each one had a story, i got this one at this sample sale. i got this one for free when i worked there. this one was the last night of this dress that sold out that season. this was the first silk anna sui dress i got years ago, and it still looks as good as it did back then. this marc jacobs shirt was lost in my closet but now that i've found it, what am i going to do with it now?
I am without a doubt unable to pay my student loans which are about 1K a month. this is the part where i go goddamn i am royally screwed. before i was sorta floating on the river bank, avoiding the rocks. now i'm on a rickety raft, with holes and trying to stay afloat.
i knew this girl who was getting married, she too got laid off. her fiance got a huge paycut at the law firm he was at. She told me that she was postponing the wedding. i felt really bad for, and i figured suggesting eloping would have been bad. but you want happiness right?
i'm over my txting on my cell phone. i've txted a lot outside my at&t/cingular network which is unlimited, hence why my phone bill is way expensive. sigh. i am so screwed. i need to lower my plan a lot. no more txting. anyone on at&t feel free to txt me as much as you want. its free. everyone else, sorry. call me instead. i have a ton of roll over minutes oddly enough.
Halloween was a disaster. it has been the worst halloween ever. the day after, was better, but still. now that' its fall and getting colder, i can only wonder how we will all get through this. i can only wonder what tomorrow will be like now. will i just end up temping again like i did years ago? pushing paper around for a bunch of assholes? maybe.